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Here and Now

Hi There

Welcome to this website. I hope you will enjoy a little walk about my life. At the moment I am very concerned about several global issues particularly the right to free speech and where it crosses the line into harassment and terrorism. I have found myself at the very forefront of radically active hate without the ability to respond. While I am in absolute favor of the right to say how you feel I absolutely can find no justification for the tactics that many groups use to undermine simple lives. To lie about someone or something is not a way to get your point across. Our ancestors did not leave somewhere else to come here and have all their terrors reinvented in the new world. While it would be great if we could all agree it would be better still if we could all be kind. It is hard to deal with an enemy and still stay spiritually connected. There are no ethics in being unethical oneself. There are no morals in being immoral and substituting lies for truth. There is no excuse for free speech with a mask on there is no excuse for harassment and terror in any way in any shape in any form. There is no truth in violence. The world is a fragile place right now. In almost every country there is injustice and intolerance neither of which will get us a better world. What to do?

8 Comments

  1. Robert Regenbogen
    Posted April 6, 2010 at 5:19 pm | Permalink

    ROKIE,
    You are an amazing and accomplished women of many talents. The world is a fabulously better place with you in it !!!!!!!!!
    Robert Regenbogen (Rainbow)

  2. Jocelyne
    Posted April 8, 2010 at 1:35 pm | Permalink

    Love the new look! Miss the “Where is Rokie” section! Today’s communication/media environment crosses lines between News and Editorial-One seeking information is often bombarded with 1 sided opinions which pose as “truth” Beware of what you read, hear and see as what you take to become your truth may have started as someone else’s lie! Keep asking questions!

  3. Allabelle
    Posted May 6, 2010 at 12:28 am | Permalink

    My Dear! What is happening to you? I haven’t seen you in nearly a year and I’m saddened to hear of your troubles. What sort of harassment are you dealing with? All my best.

  4. Karla Marks
    Posted November 12, 2010 at 12:17 pm | Permalink

    Looking forward to hearing all about your new journey and hope I am able to share some of your new experiences…Mazel Tov on all you have accomplished….May G-D watch over you and your family and keep a smile on your
    beautiful face….
    Karla

  5. Susan
    Posted December 30, 2012 at 12:21 am | Permalink

    Rokie, Do you remember me, I had the pleasure of taking care of Miel a very long time ago. She was so beautiful! I pulled out my recipes and one for poppy seed cook ies was on notepad paper with your name on it. I am happy to see you have had a good life. I wish you well,give Miel a big hug for me! Love,Susan

  6. Posted October 28, 2015 at 4:55 pm | Permalink

    I could stay with him. Since I left I was disowned by my dad bsuacee I wasn’t into religion as he is and for a couple other reasons that aren’t really necessary, but I had a terrible childhood with him anyways. My mom; out of the picture. Things started going terrible with my uncle, tried to get me into hard drugs as he was, as well as something else and I ended up leaving their immediately and since then I was on the streets and I pretty much just gave up.I know that’s a pretty sad excuse..It was for about a month and almost 3 weeks. I was walking off the skytrain and this guy walked by me and looked at me funny and it was definitely hard to miss..I didn’t think much of it, but then about 20 seconds later he walked back and said he’s seen me around a few times and asked if I wanted to go get something to eat with him and I said sure. We went to subway and he got me something and we started talking and he immediately asked me what happened? as he knew I was homeless I guess and I explained to him. We talked a lot and he asked me If I was Romanian..Its in my background so he was right and I asked why and he said you just look it as I am too, but we both don’t speak it.Basically we went around and talked for a few hours after eating and he was really interesting and he seemed REALLY interested in me which I thought was extremely strange, he looked wealthy and extremely physically attractive. He brought me to his apartment and before I went in I asked if he was a pimp bsuacee I’ve been approached a couple other times and completely avoided it, and he laughed and said no I’m not and pulled out his ID and it showed he was 17, so he was almost 5 years younger then me, I thought he was AT LEAST 25, absolutely no way I thought he could have been 17 by the way he was developed and how he carried himself ..We went in and he lived alone, nicely set up but of course not a new apartment but it was still nice, and he said you can stay here, its safer for you then being outside, and I didn’t really know what to say and he insisted saying its really okay..I just of course felt a little bad but I said okay. He trusted me completely, set up blankets on the couch for me to sleep and said you can stay here as long as you want. I asked him why are you doing this for me and he told me I just see something special in you ..I’ve been here for 12 days now, he insisted buying me clothes and some stuff I needed, he even went out with me to help me find a job, and I start working on Saturday..Everyday he takes me out and we go eat and spend all his free time with me, he even got my a gym pass and he takes me to the gym every night and we go swimming after..I’m 5’3 about 105lbs but I’d like to gain a bit of muscle so he shows me a lot which is really cool.. we talk about everything and I asked why he is living alone and he explained he had a bad and abusive childhood and has been on his own since 15, his older brother is in jail for murdering his mother and his dad is dead too, and that he has NO family. He works from 9 to 4, he works for the city and told me he met someone who was a senior who is a manager for the city or something and hired him bsuacee of his situation, and he literally works his butt off to keep it bsuacee of the pay and the benefits, and after we go right to the gym to work out, and then when we get back he does a bit of schooling online for a couple hours that he lets me help him with a bit too.Even though I’ve known him for 12 days or so, we just get a long so well and I didn’t expect anything like this to ever happen. I’m just confused in a way why he’s interested in me, not trying to brag or anything but I can see him being with some high maintnence blonde barbie doll girl with fake breasts or any girl he wants really :S I have shorter brown hair and Ive never even been one to wear makeup I just dont like to.. he’s such a hard working person and responsible for his age, doesn’t seem to have many friends though but he says he has a couple close ones but thats about it..Is he interested in me in a relationship way? I just don’t know..He always looks in my eyes when he talks to me though, so I guess that can be a hint..We watch movies at night but we don’t cuddle or anything and I’d really like to honestly but we do sit close, how can I bring it up, or if I just rested my head on his shoulder, would it be a bad idea? I still sleep on the couch, how would he react if I went into his room at night and asked if I could sleep with him just so we can cuddle or give affection? I don’t want him to think the wrongidea, bsuacee I’m NOT that kind of girl we both had bad childhoods and we can relate a lot about lots of things, we both dont do drugs either and about the age, it doesnt matter to me at all..We’re in Canada as well so nothing is illegal. I’m just wondering if he is looking for a relationship or not, and if it would be a good idea if I made a move as in asking to cuddle or anything like that, I just don’t want things to get awkward but honestly I know he’s really comfortable with me and I’m comfortable with him as well as we talk just about everything together, there isn’t anything we’re not comfortable talking about and we joke around a lot as well. He explained that I can live with him for as long as you want and never to be afraid of asking for anything bsuacee he’ll help me no matter what and that he knows how it feels to be homeless and how hard it can be. For example he works lots and then at the gym real hard afterwards and I can tell he’sreally exhausted when we get home..what if I offered to give him a massage oranything like that? I just want to know if it would be a good idea or not to ask him if he would like me to give him any affection at all, bsuacee I know he’s never really receieved any when he was younger..as I didn’t really eitherand oh for example when we go swimming we play around and stuff and we’ve touched eachother’s body but not sexually of course, but in the pool..and for the last 4 days or so we sit on the couch together oppose to sitting on opposite couches little things like that.I also told him when I start working I’m going to be helping with rent and utilities, I could honestly say we trust each other 100% even if it’s that fast..And he accepted that I will help pay and he is fine with that.

  7. Posted December 11, 2015 at 8:52 pm | Permalink

    I love you to, but i then found out from a previous girl that he had slept with that they were senieg one another and he use to tell he loved her all the time. We were on holiday this summer and were both ill with a travellers diarrhea and we had antibiotics and when we came back he said he was still ill and he went to the doctors and had tests and they said he had a bacteria infection caused by food and when I said I will claim on the insurance or the hotels insurance he got very angry about it and said he had no doctors notes or proof coz he threw it all away and then he was like I don’t want you to claim and got in a mood. This same week he had 700 pounds taken out of his back account and I quizzed him coz I had this done to me in the past and I asked him what the bank had said. He said that they weren’t really doing much about it, even tho he had shown them proof he didn’t spend the money and he said he doesn’t think he will get it back! He said he travels around to different countries with work and when we first got together he said he might be going to china, but this never happen, then he said Siberia and this never happened. He Recently told me he was going to china with work for 3 weeks so when he was meant to be there I rang his company up and he was in England and when I said could I speak to Andrew ****** the project design manager, they said “what? Who are you after? “. Which seemed weird to me. I confronted him about the china thing and he said im going tonight the flight was cancelled they hadn’t got back to us about us going even tho he had told me the week before it was all finalised. Then later on in the conversation he told me he was going the following week, but he didn’t. He also said you have to write an invitation to be aloud to go into china from england on business is this true? We had arranged to go the cinema one night and he blew me off to go clubbing with his mates and gave me lots of excuses. One being he couldn’t go to the cinema with me on the thursday coz he had to work early in the morning on the Saturday, other wise people might lose there jobs and as I live 40 minutes away from him he would have to have left mine in the morning so wouldnt have managed to get to work. That morning I rang him and he was still in bed! I have since broken up with him because he cheated on me for a second time. He did it once before where he was sending flirty texts to a girl (texts sent over a few days) he use to see and he told her he was in Sweden with work and made up this complicated stuff he had to do over there for work, but he was in england with me. He was also arranging to meet up with her one weekend. I fogave him for this and he said he wasn’t a cheater he would never cheat and he wasn’t really going to meet up with her. His excuse for this was that he was mad from an argument we had had that day and he has never ever had an argument in his life not even with his parents or siblings. Then everything was ok until I found more flirty messages from another girl and he was flirting with her so I rang the number and she said they had been to the pub quiz together and had kissed and were texting all week. He admitted to this but said she had kissed her but she says its the other way around. Andrew also said he doesn’t fancy her he just did it.and she had just working at started working at that pub that week, but I know for a fact she started in may because I have since talked to the other bar staff there. I broke with him there and then, but after this I rang him to gets answers to why he did it and because stupidly I would have taken him back because I missed him so much (I am sooooo thankful tht this did not happen) He said he wasn’t senieg this girl and he hasn’t seen her or been to the pub with her because of his medison, then later he changed his story and said they went to the pub in a group. I found out from a friend of mine that knows this girl well, that they didn’t stop texting when we broke up and they went to the cinema not the pub. And she is now not having any of what I say because Andrew w(I missed the end off) This girl doesnt believe me he was cheating on me with her, because andrew told her we had broken up ages ago and has got his brother to lie for him. But she is young and very naive so is taken in by his lies as like me it was what I wanted to believe in even tho I always took it with a pinch of salt. I am concerned that he may have something wrong with him, to lie so much and I think he may believe his own lies. He also told me he loved me more than anything in the world, but I guess that was another one of his lies.Oh and he told me he didn’t like blondes and didn’t fancy small girls, and hates rock and emo music and people ,but the second girl he cheated on me with was small, 5ft3 and has blonde hair and a rocker/emo.Sorry for the essay lol!Could this gut have something wrong with him?Do you not think he could have something wrong with him tho like that compulsive lying thing?

  8. Posted April 6, 2016 at 3:58 pm | Permalink

    At Here + Now we think that communities can come in many shapes and sizes and the one that we serve is focused on the concept of ‘sharing or having certain attitudes’ and also has geographical relevance as we work with communities that either work, live, play, pass through or connect in anyway with a place.

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